It all started 8 months ago…

After almost 3 years, when I was giving my heart and soul to build the start-up, I realized that things don’t work for me anymore…

I was helping to build the company’s technology from day one and joined as the 2nd worker, hoping to become a partner once I prove myself and help building the company to what it is today. As the time passed, I begun to understand that there’s a good chance that things do not go as I hope, regardless of my efforts.

I realized that if I want to stay happy and healthy, I have to change some things.
The current constellation at the company didn’t work for me anymore, I felt like I’m not getting the credit for my work and didn’t get the chance to stand at the front of the company during important events. I was constantly frustrated.

So I decided to take a month off, clear my mind and imagine my future. Given that I hardly took any days off for three years I could take a month off easily. I gave a two months’ notice for the vacation and kept carrying the work done on the fuel fumes of my remaining energy.

The vacation began and it was amazing!
My wife and I had the quality time we haven’t had in 5 years, we talked about our future and the life we want to build for our young family, leaving job titles and status aside.
We went to Italy and enjoyed the sceneries and the AMAZING Italian food, but most important – we promised ourselves that we will be brave enough to change our life in order to be happy, even if the change is hard. We should be ready to step out of our comfort zone in order to fulfill our dreams.

The vacation made me realize that my deepest desire is to be a REAL partner of a company, not an employee. That’s the reason I’ve been working so hard for years, that’s the root of everything.

I have to talk with my CEO and get things fixed. In my opinion there were two options that could make both of us satisfied:

1. Become a partner and serve as the CTO where the current CTO becomes a COO.
   After all, for the last 3 years, I feel that’s what I’ve been doing anyway…and in my opinion, the current CTO can be a great COO, far better than any other option I could think of.
2. Keep working for three days a week as a part time job. It will allow me to keep giving the company what it needs in the technological aspect and on the other hand, give me enough time to nurture my own dreams in parallel.

The vacation has ended and I went back to work, ready to invite my CEO for a beer and talk things over.

The time has come, and we sat over for a talk. I told him about my thoughts and how things are not working for me at the moment.

I have to admit that his reaction surprised me because not only he wasn’t willing to talk about the option of making me a partner, he wasn’t willing to negotiate about a part time job as well!

I was trying to explain him that I have dreams too and there is a way that allows me to make my dreams come true while I’m helping his dream to come true. I want to be total to myself and at the same time continue building the company.

Then he explained me why he wouldn’t negotiate with a story about Napoleon:
“Do you know how Napoleon won his battles?
Every time he landed on a beach shore for a battle, he burned all of his ships behind. That way his soldiers knew that they have to win the battle because they have no other choice, no way back nor backup plan. I want you to be total for the company.”

Wow…That’s rough…am I only a soldier?

The story made me think for a while and in the end, it brought me to the following clear conclusions:

1. Although I’ve been working my ass off for the company for 3 years like it was my own dream, days and nights, weekends and holidays, 14 hours a day for months…I think that I’m perceived as a tool, a facilitator, a soldier without dreams with a sole purpose to win someone else’s battles.
2. He sees it as a ‘zero sum’ game, he wants me to be total for the company’s dreams even if it comes instead of being total to my own dreams.
3. He wants the company to be my only option to get food on my plate, that way I’ll have to keep it satisfied in its own terms, day after day, year after year.

Since I’m a graduate of an Engineering degree, once I get to a logic realization or understand how something works, there is no way back…

The only way for me to make my dreams come true is to STEP OUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE and make things happen my own way!

I owe that conclusion to my CEO who was sincere and fair enough to tell me how he really sees me after 3 years of partnership.

So…I QUIT!
Thank you Napoleon!